"Bubba Ho-Tep" 2002

“Bubba Ho-Tep”

“Your soul suckin' days are over, amigo!”

This post contains some language that may offend people. Sorry Mom.

I heard about this movie during a family potluck. I have three very cool nephews and their super cool father who were quoting this movie. They were laughing hysterically and even when they told me the plot, I wasn’t so sure about it. I threw it in the old Netflix queue and figured I’d give it a shot. After all, who could resist the description of “Elvis and JFK fight a mummy”.

When it came in the mail, it sat in the little red envelope for nearly a week before we got around to popping it in the DVD player.

We see an old man in sunglasses laying in an ancient nursing home bed. And that trademark voice drawls out over the scene.

“I was dreamin'. Dreamin' my dick was out and I was checkin' to see if that infected bump on the head of it had filled with pus again. If it had, I was gonna name it after my ex-wife 'cilla and bust it by jackin' off. Or I'd like to think that's what I'd do. Dreams let you think like that. Truth was, I hadn't had a hard-on in years.”

That immediately got my attention. It was just the start of a roller coaster ride of epic proportions. We find out the King had switched places with an Elvis impersonator and was stuck when the fake Elvis checked out early.

Then in rolls the former President of the United States, John F. Kennedy. He was disguised and hidden for his own protection. But the world forgot him in the dingy little nursing home in East Texas.

They are the only ones to notice that a mummy is roaming the halls at night. He is feeding on the souls of the old folks and doing pretty well. But he is spotted by the King and JFK. They decide that the last thing they want, after surviving all they’ve been through, is to lose their souls.

My husband and I have watched this movie many times since that night. We sent it back to Netflix, but had ordered the DVD from Amazon before the mailman picked it up.

And as good as this movie is, it is even better with commentary from the King himself. He gives his side of the story, takes cell phone calls, and eats. It makes a fun movie even better.

It isn’t a widely known movie, so I won’t give away too much. It is a delightfully dark comedy.

Elvis: Jack wait. Marilyn.
[JFK looks at him funny]
Elvis: Come on, Marilyn Monroe? How was she in the sack?
JFK: That is classified information! Top Secret! But between you and me... Wow!

If the quotes intrigue you, give a chance. It is a great way to spend a couple of hours.